I hope mine doesn't look like that
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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