We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Randomize
