Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
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