You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
