At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
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