So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Randomize