There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
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