Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
No stitches, just platelets and will power
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
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