I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
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