nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Randomize
