i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize