Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
Randomize