yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
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