True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize