Texts From Last Night

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  (954): View more from Florida

  He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"

  (954): View more from Florida

  Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.

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  (954): He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?" (954): Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall. http://tfl.nu/238l
  Replies (15) Good night (698) Bad night (2838)
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  (904): View more from Florida

  I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me

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  (904): I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me http://tfl.nu/myzn
  Replies (28) Good night (1082) Bad night (6089)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  How has he not realized you're pregnant?

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  Spanx.

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  (973): How has he not realized you're pregnant? (201): Spanx. http://tfl.nu/ts9v
  Replies (31) Good night (1228) Bad night (5307)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night

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  (214): My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night http://tfl.nu/co3c
  Replies (32) Good night (5578) Bad night (2550)
• Favorite

  (641): View more from Iowa

  and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"

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  (641): and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger" http://tfl.nu/o631
  Replies (20) Good night (5630) Bad night (1883)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!

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  (732): Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?! http://tfl.nu/h8uq
  Replies (10) Good night (783) Bad night (4411)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?

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  (919): At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex? http://tfl.nu/35cd
  Replies (27) Good night (1003) Bad night (4768)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree

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  (215): i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree http://tfl.nu/vm1y
  Replies (2) Good night (1519) Bad night (869)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?

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  (314): hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay? http://tfl.nu/svsk
  Replies (11) Good night (3470) Bad night (521)
• Favorite

  (208): View more from Idaho

  Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere

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  (208): Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere http://tfl.nu/5ite
  Replies (4) Good night (1196) Bad night (514)
• Favorite

  (445): View more from Pennsylvania

  We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing

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  (445): We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing http://tfl.nu/ir7s
  Replies (6) Good night (964) Bad night (384)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though

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  (512): I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though http://tfl.nu/zufj
  Replies (2) Good night (1159) Bad night (372)
• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)

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  (309): Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.) http://tfl.nu/zrht
  Replies (3) Good night (870) Bad night (267)
• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box

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  (760): Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box http://tfl.nu/sl6b
  Replies (4) Good night (255) Bad night (565)
• Favorite

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.

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  (413): Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him. http://tfl.nu/18mb
  Replies (1) Good night (941) Bad night (196)

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