We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
Dear god my vagina.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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