its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize