Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize