I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
Randomize
