apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
and you fell through a lawn chair
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
Randomize