Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
I enjoy the company of your penis
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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