im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
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