The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
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