Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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