i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
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