She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
