Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
