Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
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