I smell stomach acid.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
