Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
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