if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
17 year olds will be the death of me.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.