dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
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