I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Less talking, more tequila
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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