between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
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yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
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