i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
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i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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