I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
