ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Randomize