And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
