We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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