Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Randomize
