That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
they're like a gay fantastic four
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
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