Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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