Texts From Last Night

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  (515): View more from Iowa

  sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke

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  (515): sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke http://tfl.nu/6ss8
  Replies (16) Good night (3171) Bad night (997)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.

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  (541): The seats are awesome but you see two of each player. http://tfl.nu/6r36
  Replies (12) Good night (2917) Bad night (745)
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  (216): View more from Ohio

  Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.

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  (216): Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product. http://tfl.nu/f048
  Replies (24) Good night (869) Bad night (4176)
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  (804): View more from Virginia

  he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...

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  (804): he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ... http://tfl.nu/7lew
  Replies (30) Good night (4037) Bad night (921)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us

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  (919): CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us http://tfl.nu/dd67
  Replies (80) Good night (3530) Bad night (4683)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.

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  (732): i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that. http://tfl.nu/vsly
  Replies (26) Good night (1233) Bad night (8000)
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  (641): View more from Iowa

  is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.

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  (641): is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink. http://tfl.nu/upl9
  Replies (29) Good night (4824) Bad night (1556)
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  (520): View more from Arizona

  Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.

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  (520): Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already. http://tfl.nu/ffp6
  Replies (18) Good night (4840) Bad night (1160)
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  (336): View more from North Carolina

  I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone

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  (336): I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone http://tfl.nu/escl
  Replies (6) Good night (1321) Bad night (988)
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  (801): View more from Utah

  P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.

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  (801): P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play. http://tfl.nu/s3w0
  Replies (10) Good night (2293) Bad night (589)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship

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  (717): Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship http://tfl.nu/uea0
  Replies (1) Good night (473) Bad night (1103)
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  (408): View more from California

  Dude, that was like bongs ago.

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  (408): Dude, that was like bongs ago. http://tfl.nu/4e28
  Replies (1) Good night (771) Bad night (335)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.

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  (248): Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us. http://tfl.nu/bddr
  Replies (4) Good night (1049) Bad night (374)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor

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  (814): Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor http://tfl.nu/6e1k
  Replies (0) Good night (501) Bad night (315)
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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?

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  (832): Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you? http://tfl.nu/bmw9
  Replies (1) Good night (574) Bad night (293)

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