i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
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