but the lizard people decide everything anyway
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
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