I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Randomize