dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Randomize
