its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Randomize