The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize
