I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
soo... how was my night?
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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