The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Randomize